Research has shown that kids across cultures will accept what they consider to be legitimate authority, but not accept others' authority over areas they consider to be personal choice. Try to let your child exercise their own authority in areas of personal choice, including things like hairstyle, dress, leisure activities, and friends, for several reasons:
This is how they learn to make decisions and experience the natural consequences of those choices
These choices help develop their identities
Feeling authority over these areas also helps them accept external authority in other areas
Demonstrate your respect for them and avoid unnecessary power struggles
When there are gray areas – for example, you feel formal dress is required at a family occasion to respect your elder family members, or you believe a friend of theirs is not a good influence – use these as opportunities to explain your view and listen to theirs and come up with a solution together.
For the same reasons, also help your child find areas where they can exert personal choice in the school setting – for example decorating their notebook, choosing what books to read, or choosing their extra-curricular activities.