Raising a kind kiddo

WHAT’S GOING ON?

Research has shown, and you've likely experienced, that kindness is win-win. Not only does it make the world better, it makes us feel better. Recognizing that we are innately good, that we care about others and that we wish to see them happy results in feelings of joy.

Kindness has been shown to:

release chemicals in the brain that improve mood, depressed feelings, and anxiety
act as a natural painkiller, and even help heal wounds!
be related to stronger relationships, communities, and even economies

If kindness is so great, however, why aren't people kind all the time? It's because there are also some powerful counter-forces working in the other direction, including:

Being kind can feel like a loss in the short-term (sharing something we want, taking time to help, etc). Humans are wired to care more about avoiding loss than about potential gains
There is a risk and vulnerability that it won't be reciprocated
The feelings of "winning," dominating, or gaining that can come from unkind deeds can also feel quite powerful, despite their long term negative effect on relationships

Most children are naturally empathetic and – when their buckets are full – will do spontaneous kind deeds (as they also spontaneously experiment with other kinds of behavior and interactions). To encourage kindness, it's critical that we create a culture that values kindness, and recognizes and supports them in their loving and kind deeds.

How does this apply to your child?

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