During the holidays, special and abundant foods are part of the traditions—and joy—of the season. But unfortunately, in our culture enjoying food can get tied up in body size and self-image, and feel tricky. And because a positive body image is important for growing kids' confidence and self-esteem, it is never too early to help your child build a good foundation in this area.
The good news is that, despite the cultural messages out there, the way you speak and behave at home can go a long way toward helping your child feel good about their body. In the spirit of Thanksgiving, gratitude is one powerful tool for a positive body image.
Positive body image and self-esteem are important for growing children. How a child feels about themselves and their body influences their ongoing quality of life. A study across 10 countries found that 67% of women avoid life activities because they dislike the way they look. And, although the beauty industry is particularly hard on girls and women, men can also grow up to feel critical about their bodies and have low self-esteem (and increasingly, eating disorders).
Research and anecdotal evidence show that puberty is often a turning point. It’s a time when young people, especially girls, tend to become unhappy with their bodies. Long before adolescence, however, parents need to lay the foundation for healthy self-esteem by helping children feel appreciative of and grateful for their bodies. And, no matter your child’s age, body image is not set in stone. It can be shaped and changed over time. Parents are a strong influence, and so are peers and the media.
American culture sends a lot of conflicting messages about food and bodies. On the one hand, advertisements push sugary snacks, fast food, and other unhealthy foods. (Have you ever seen an ad for broccoli?) But there are also plenty of messages and famous folks glorifying thin and/or buff bodies. All these messages are absorbed and have effects.
What else influences the way a child perceives their body?
Being active (or not). More exercise, especially when framed as “play” increases child well-being and improves body image.
Unfortunately, children get less outdoor and active time than in previous generations, and even more so once they start formal school. It's important to work against this trend in your family.
Focus on body and weight by adults. Adults who report strong memories of childhood body and weight awareness note the negative effect it had on their self-image. You send messages about food and bodies when you make comments about your own eating habits (“I ate too much!”), or good and bad foods (“I shouldn’t eat this.”). If you talk about your own body size/shape or desire to lose weight, your child will hear that. Same goes for comments you make about anyone else’s body in front of them.
Behavior of parents and caregivers. Our kids are always taking cues from us. If parents and caregivers model an active lifestyle and healthy eating habits, then growing children are likely to follow suit. If you are self-conscious about your body or have anxieties about bodies and/or weight, you may need to address that in order to not pass it along to your children.
Alternatively, when you model a grateful attitude for the foods you are eating (“This peach is so delicious.”) and the body you are moving in (“I'm feeling pretty good about making it up four flights of stairs.”) you set a great example.
